Has Technology Officially Killed Dating?
So what's your status? Single and ready to mingle? Divorced and back on the market? Netflix and chill? Or maybe the really ambigous "it's complicated"? Technology is virtually killing the fine art of dating.
From life milestones and relationship categories on Facebook to all the various dating apps that are out there trying to navigate the rough waters of the online dating world is not always easy. Swipe right, swipe left, the "hookup culture" is eveywhere. Technology makes it all so easy and convenient.
It's like a feeding frenzy of uber "connected", but oftentimes super jaded, emotionally guarded and lonely humans all looking for an equally connected, jaded and emotionally unavailable human to just "have fun" with or to simply pass their time with.
There are so many "labels" to choose from when it comes to describing your relationship status or lack thereof, that it's really a bit exhausting. As you sit there and overthink which little box that you are going to put yourself into without looking desperate, or coming on too strong, or worse yet pathetic, chances are you may be thinking to yourself WTF am I really even doing?
Momentary pause..... but then you push forward because you don't even remember how to meet anyone in person anymore. Why? Because technology has officially killed dating.
Socially Connected & Emotionally Distant
Technology has made the world a microcosm of sorts. You probably are aware of what is going on everywhere, at all times, and are constantly up on "what's trending". You can't miss a beat.
While there are many positives to all of the connectivity that technology and social media has given us there is something else happening. It is arguably eroding the very fabric of human interaction, the concept of collective empathy, and the ability to connect to another person on a deeper level let alone form positive and healthy romantic relationships.
It's a paradox of sorts. We have become super informed but super de-sensitized. Close to everyone and everything but far away from ourselves. Sharing the most intimate details of our lives with the wold via social but lacking the ability to make deeper, more intimate connections face to face. Remember this video from Prince Ea? He describes it all so perfectly.
The Fine Art of Flirtation
When was the last time that you flirted with someone? Not online-in person. If you can honestly say that you have flirted with someone or someone has flirted with you in person in the last week, you can skip the rest of this article. If you don't remember the last time you flirted or that someone initiated some type of flirtation with you, it's time to change up your approach.
Instead of getting on Tinder, go OUT! Go out with one other friend and see what happens. Flirtation is like anything else in life, you need to do it in order to master it. Practice makes perfect.
There is nothing more sexy and attractive than a girl or a guy who knows how to carry themselves, how to strike up a conversation, in a non-creepy, non-sleazeball way. That should be you're goal. You may feel shy at first, even intimidated but trust me, it will be worth it. Learn from a pro, but learn you must.
Ditch the Dating Ditch Call
Let's say you actually go out on dates, or you date really well. You still have this thing called the ditch call or text set up right? When did this even become a thing?
Stop going into a date with the idea that things will go wrong. Things may go wrong, but hey, they may also go right. Even if you are bored to tears with the person, do something different and a little selfless...GASP, and try to sit through and learn something about the person who took time out of their busy schedule to meet with you.
Worst case scenario, if you don't want to be there and you feel that it's just not right, don't defer to the ditch call, just excuse yourself and leave with a little dignity. In other words, ditch the ditch call. You will feel more positive about the date to begin with and if you do decide to leave, you will feel better about yourself for being honest.
What do you think about technology, dating, and relationships?